About Face

The last time I mentioned my dear mother, she had cleaned, cooked, washed and ironed just about everything in our house. She then flew off into the sunset to her distant home. What I alluded to, but did not discuss in detail, was that she had also made some statements that I believed were intended to discourage us from seeking treatment for infertility. Allow me to explain - my mom is a very active, 60-something year old woman, she takes great care of her health, exercises daily, eats well, sees an herbalist, etc. Don't get me wrong, she is not opposed to Western medicine, she's had surgery and has taken medication. She just seems to believe that drugs may be a bit overused and that diet and exercise can make a world of difference.

So in a recent discussion with her infertile daugher, she said that we should not "go" crazy. And that everything would "work out." Afterall, she'd talked with her gyn and who informed her that "every other woman suffers from endometriosis" and that doing something extreme might "mess me up." Of course, my mom was telling me in her own way that she disapproved of taking conventional medical action to cure infertility. I was really disappointed by our discussion and felt that she just didn't GET it. We've been trying for over two years and given my age and health problems, including stage 4 endo and one remaining blocked tube -- we. have. no. choice. Anyhow, I decided for my own sake that I would not discuss any fertility issues with her any further. I just didn't want to deal with the disappointment.

Well, fastforward to today. Dear mom called me up this morning and after talking about family, friends, some lower back and leg pain that she is experiencing and, coincidently, some lower back and leg pain that I am experiencing, she turned the discussion to a cousin of mine who is suffering from SIF and was recently diagnosed with severe endometriosis. This turned into a tubal discussion, at which point I suggested that my cousin will unlikely get pregnant, if the endo has caused tubal blockage. Well, Mom proceeded to say that without tubes, a person would have to do IVF. You could have knocked me over with a feather! Was my mother actually talking about IVF?!?!?!?! Has she now realized that her only hope of having a bio grandchild or two rests in the womb of an endo-riddled, tubeless (for all intents and purposes), infertile, 35 year old woman!?!?!?!?! I think so.

We then discussed IVF. I mean not in great detail, but I finally shared with her Dr. NHB's recommendation that we pursue IVF. I also told her that we had met with Dr. L, who advised us that he would only transfer two embryos, assuming we get that far. (I think the prospect of high order multiples frightened her). I assured her that reputable fertility clinics do no want women to have high order pregnancies and that although twins are common at our clinic, triplets are rare. She talked about a girlfriend of hers, whose daughter successfully did IVF and had twins a few years ago. She was upbeat and positive about everything. She believes that everything will work out and we will have our sweet babies in due time. I, however, am less confident but it's nice to know that someone is maintaining a positive outlook on our behalf.

At least, I feel better about it. I feel like one of my biggest fans in the whole world is on the same page as me. And that brings tears to my eyes and a smile to my lips.

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I am really concerned about my in-laws residing in Houston. My MIL is a nurse and has been asked to remain in the city to provide medical assistance, as it may become necessary. Although my in-laws are not in a low lying area of the city and have not been subject to a mandatory evacuation order, my in-laws and a few other relatives will be riding out the storm in a hospital in Houston. I pray that they remain safe.