Monday, October 03, 2005

Body Slammed

I just returned from my mock embryo transfer. I had hoped that I would return with great news that we are moving forward, full steam ahead. Unfortunately, Dr. L did not say things like "Everything looks great!" and "Gosh, what a lovely future home this will be for some future embryos." Instead he said "What is this?" and "When is your HSG scheduled for?" and "Please make sure they give you copies of the films from the HSG."

Dr. L seems to think he was seeing a mass floating around in there, perhaps another HYDROSALPINX! Are you kidding me? Could this actually be happening? I fear that we are teetering dangerously close to needing another lap and the removal of my remaining tube. I just can't take it.

Besides, the HSG was normal last September! Normal, I tell you!!! How can it be that I went from having seemingly normal tubes last fall to having one possibly, two hydrosalpinx less than a year later!!!! Can an HSG definitely indicate the presense of a hydrosalpinx? What the f*&%k?????

Dr. L also noted that "There is a lot of endo still in there." This is amazing. I knew that Dr. NHB hadn't been able to remove all of the endo. What I didn't know was that they can actually see endo in an u/s, especially since I have had many many u/s and were it not for the presense of the endometrioma, no one would have ever diagnosed the endometriosis prior to the lap. This makes me wonder why the endometriosis wasn't diagnosed months ago! Why are we just now seeing endo when clearly it was there all along.

I am frustrated, angry and fed up by this whole process. I'll post again after Friday's HSG.

19 Comments:

At 2:19 PM, Blogger Donna said...

Body slam indeed! This is just so wrong. I had a similar situation happen, things look fine one test, then on the next, uh oh, this isn't right...

I am so frustrated for you. I'll be checking back.

 
At 4:46 PM, Blogger Mellie said...

Oh Chee, that just sucks. How freakin' unfair. But is there such a thing as a second opinion? How can it be that one doc sees something not seen before?

 
At 5:17 PM, Anonymous erin said...

Oh, this is just not a good day. It's like a body slam with a full-Nelson thrown in for good measure.

 
At 6:09 PM, Blogger Larisa said...

I'm so sorry. I hope the HSG shows better things than today's u/s did.

I don't know why the doctors just can't see the same things, do the same things.

 
At 6:34 PM, Blogger Spanglish said...

I'll be watching for your HSG report... please know you're in my thoughts and prayers.

 
At 6:56 PM, Blogger k #2 said...

Chee Chee. OH! How frustrating! With all the tests and Docs you've been seeing, you would think you would know more about what is going on. Although, when you are dealing with the insides, it isn't as easy as we wish, is it?

While sometimes I feel like an expert on women's body, what is hydrosalpinx?

Chee Chee, I am positive you are NOT down for the count. I look forward to hearing what the HSG shows on Friday.

 
At 7:35 PM, Blogger zhl said...

Well, crap, Chee Chee. That is so frustrating and so unnerving. It makes it hard to trust your doctor when something like this happens. I hope the HSG is better.

Hang in there.

 
At 9:25 PM, Anonymous Lori said...

This just sucks, I'm sorry you keep getting slammed. I hope the HSG brings some clarity as to what exactly is going on in there. As if you needed any more frustrations...

 
At 10:23 PM, Blogger Nico said...

ARGH! Why is nothing, NOTHING, ever easy??? I'm so sorry, and hope that the HSG will show that this doc is totally off base and you're set to go.

 
At 6:44 AM, Blogger betty said...

Bloody hell, how frustrating is that? NOT FAIR. Thinking of you Chee

 
At 8:31 AM, Blogger K|nneret said...

Oh Cheech, I'm so sorry! That sucks in a huge way! Why can't it be easy - just once??? Damnit. How frustrating for you!!!
*hugs*
Good luck Friday and please call if you need someone to talk you off the ledge, ok?

 
At 10:50 AM, Blogger Chee Chee said...

Thanks for all of the comments and questions.

Mellie -- I think that the HSG on Friday will, supposedly, provide us with more clarity on this tubal issue.

Kate #2 -- A hydrosalpinx is the presense of clear infected fluid in the fallopian tube. It's generally caused by a past infection.

The thing that gets me is that at each stage of my testing, no infections have been found, I should be fine. I can't help wondering if the use of the dye to check my tubes isn't causing the problem. The first HSG was normal, a few months later I have the hydro. During the lap the remaining tube was blocked but normal, now there may be a second hydro. Could the dye be causing the infection? And if so, do I want another HSG at all?

 
At 3:51 PM, Blogger Pamplemousse said...

I am sorry that you are having to go through this after thinking you had been given the green light to go ahead. It is so frustrating. I hope that things will be clearer after Friday's HSG.

 
At 5:08 PM, Anonymous thalia said...

This really sucks cheechee, I'm so sorry. I don't understand how they can see the endo on the ultrasound by the way - was it another cyst or what was he seeing?

Really hoping there's no hydrosalpinx there.

 
At 10:07 AM, Anonymous Jill said...

What incredible suckiness! I'm so sorry and upset for you, Chee Chee. I know that this news is the last thing you need right now. You have already been through so much. I hope and pray that somehow the HSG turns out to be reassuring, and I'm sending you hugs and best wishes.

 
At 3:59 PM, Blogger Chee Chee said...

Thalia - This is a great question. He performed a sonohysterogram and my uterus looked fine but my pelvis generally had a sort of hazy, grainy appearance on the u/s monitor. This, he seemed to think indicated the presense of endo. I don't know how he could definitively determine that it was endo but what do I know.

 
At 4:57 PM, Blogger Allie said...

I can't think of a better description. You were definitely body slammed. I'm so sorry. What a bummer. Let's hope that it is just a small speedbump and not a roadblock. I'll be thinking of you.

 
At 1:26 PM, Anonymous Alex/Infertile Gourmet said...

I am sorry that things are not moving forward. This is really frustrating for you I am sure....

Sending warm thoughts your way.

 
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